It has been so long since I’ve been to the gym that my favourite trainer guy has left. I have an appointment on Sunday with some guy called Malcolm. I hope he isn’t scary.

I have a hair appointment on the 1st of June. This is good because I can get it done again right before I go to France at the end of July. Woo for not looking stupid when you feel insecure!

I’m reading the archive of xeney.com at the moment, and in one entry she was talking about songs and mentioned Simon & Garfunkel’s The Boxer. She happened to type the lyrics and my eyes didn’t believe it, so I went to independent confirmation. In the second verse I’d always heard:

Asking only workman’s wages, I come lookin for a job, but I get no offers
Just to come home from the wars on 7th avenue
I do declare there were times
?????
I took some comfort there

Which I admit doesn’t make a lot of sense, but I’m also quick to admit I don’t know the words to anything. Not completely 100% in any event. I’m happy to sing along with things even without the words, provided you make noises that sound right no one notices.That’s what my choir teacher told us to do if we were having trouble mastering the French [or German or Latin etc.] in a piece. Anyway, Beth’s entry said and I have had confirmed and I have re-listened and can hear it so the words are actually:

Asking only workman’s wages, I come lookin for a job, but I get no offers
Just a come on from the whores on 7th avenue
I do declare, there were times when I was so lonesome
I took some comfort there

I’m not sure what to think of it. I’m surprised that my Mom let me listen to it. Once shortly after Boys for Pele [Tori!!] came out my Mom was in my room and Professional Widow came on, as some of you know it ends with the words, “give me love, peace and a hard cock”. I hadn’t heard that yet and I hadn’t read the booklet yet either, but my Mom heard it and told me I wasn’t to listen to the song again. I said okay to appease her, but I suspect we both know I had every intention of listening to it again and anything else Tori cared to release. And another time, I was listening to Fear by Toad the Wet Sprocket with her in the room and I skipped Hold Her Down and when she asked why I said because the f-word was in it, she then wanted to know how I knew, thinking quickly I said that Dad had told me [it was my Dad's CD]. She left it there.

Anyway, point is the woman has the hearing of a shark [so to speak]. So is a man getting whores more acceptable than a woman getting a hard cock? If my Mom and I had an open and honest relationship I could ask her, but we don’t.

New Linkin Park and Björk arrived today. If you ever look at a photo of the Björk’s Volta and think that the photo just looks like a solid picture you’d be wrong. The photo is a sticker holding the two parts together. I hope it doesn’t lose it’s stickiness or we’ll have one floppy CD. Linkin Park swear! I’m amazed. Fuck has shown up repeatedly in at least two songs so far! Exciting times. Also, I went for the fancy edition with the MVI CD and the book, they weren’t lying when they said book. I have a hardback novel sized book with CDs on the inside of both covers and the CD booklet is not just a booklet. We’re talking fancy. I haven’t listened to Björk yet and I’m only half way through LP, so I’ll hold off reviewing.

I spent another three hours in the garden startling snails this morning. Startled snails secrete something that looks like saliva with bubbles in. I could feel their anger. I also go creeped out by a recently opened sac of spiders. Anyway, since pictures speak 1000 words, behold:

I feel I ought to mention that the green parts left the gravel are not weeds, but rather two daffodils and some carrots. This whole back bit used to be a vegetable garden until the previous tenants didn’t keep it weed free, when it got overran the landlord just put down black fabric stuff and gravel.

The view from the house isn’t much better from the lower windows [top photo], but the upper windows tell another story:

The top left bit is that bit last Friday when I finished, the top right bit is today when I finished and the bottom one is up close. Even though overall there was less grass this time, it took me just as long because I weeded that bit by the fence, all the cracks in the pavement and I trimmed the hedge [not pictured].

Sadly, I still have a long way to go. I reckon I can get it all weed free in another 10 hours. Then I will spray weed killer over everything.

I need to trim the hedges properly, weed that back bit and the side bits, I’d like to get the wood chips we bought last year put down and of course I’ll need to mow the lawn once in a while.

I really ought to do some homework now, but I think I’ve earned a quick game of Settlers.