I’m off to France tomorrow. I’ll be getting up, eating, putting myself together, packing the last few things and then to the hair dressers. Horatio and his Dad will, in theory, be here waiting for me upon my return.

So I’m spending the evening with Weasel since I won’t see her for ten days. This is sad making. Having the two of them is wonderful and I love it, but I don’t love having to say good bye to someone every time. Ends up with a lot of bitter sweetness.

My last appointment with the ENT should have been another £150, but it turns out there was a mistake on our last invoice so they let us have a freebie. This makes me feel a little better about the whole thing. I just wish I could be better, at the rate I’m going I’ll be dealing with this for a year. I’m at seven months now.

Current plan is to write up the Ice Cream tour and a bit of this week on Horatio’s laptop. Then I’ll chronicle the holiday itself and share all of it on my return.

So I’ll see you all in August!

I have so many things to say, but I have no time in which to say them.

I’m hoping to have a little time on Wednesday to catch up, if I don’t I may end up waiting until after France, which is just crazy.

Perhaps I just cover last Friday, then I’ll cover the Ice Cream Tour later on. My sister called very upset on Friday morning. I called her back and tried to help as best I could. It left me feeling very odd, I wanted to be able to do more for her. I presume everything calmed down because I haven’t heard from her, but at the same time, I haven’t heard from her. I had to leave after 45 minutes to go to a doctor’s appointment, Weasel stayed on the phone with her for hours after that. The distance is difficult sometimes.

My appointment was the follow-up with the ENT. I knew my hearing wasn’t great beforehand, but I thought it was just waiting to calm down still. Turns out the grommet is blocked now too. Thankfully, my symptoms that prompted the placing of the grommet are still gone*, but I’m about 30% deaf in my right ear. He said we could swap the grommet out or wait to see what happens. I opted to wait since getting the grommet in the first place cost us £719. I have to inhale steam twice a day and I have nose drops again. I have to go back again in September if my ear isn’t clear to the point that I can hear a wrist watch ticking when I hold it to my ear.

* My teeth would ache when I exercised. I could hear my heart beat all the time. 24/7 non-stop thumping. Both are gone with grommet in place.

I went into town after the doctors and bought two new shirts, a few pharmacy things and some things at Lush then went to Borders and wandered around. I spotted Jasper Fford’s new book and gave it a loving stroke then moved up through the store. I went back to it twice before I left. I sooo want it. But I really cannot justify spending anymore money this month. So I shall order it on my return from France.

It doesn’t help that a small part of me wants a Nintendo DS. Weasel bought one last month and her friend very kindly lent her New Super Mario Bros. and I’ve been playing it. Mario 3 was the only video game I was even a little bit good at. This has elements of all three Mario games all mixed together with some excellent new bits and I’m so enjoying it. The part that wants her own DS, is thinking that Horatio and Weasel both have one so we could play games together on it too.

I keep fretting about trip to France as well. I’m never sure what to pack even though I make loads of lists beforehand. Plus I’m going as a guest so I’m not in control of much and it is very frustrating for me. I’m doing my best not to get worked up and if I do get worked up to use that energy to add to my list and plan further. For example, I was worrying about having enough to read. I have the new Harry Potter book saved and ready to go, but I’ll need more for 10 days. Doodle recently lent me a book by Meg Gardiner saying it was the first of a series, so I’ve arranged for Mal to take the books with her to work on Wednesday and I’ll stop by and pick them up on my way home from the gym. I also plan to do two batches of laundry on Wednesday so I can be sure to have all the clothes I want for the trip.

My knee was very angry at me today, which scares me slightly. It is fine for everything except cycling. It was very unhappy about the whole pushing the pedal down and the resistance. I ended up in a ridiculously low gear going much slower than I wanted. I don’t know the exact speed though because my cycle computer isn’t working. I took my bike to the shop last week to be checked over before I took it to France and they must have knocked something because it hasn’t worked since. I can’t see anything wrong with it so I’m buying a new one in France. I digress, my knee had better be happier tomorrow or I shall be very grumpy indeed.

Have important video game [Ico on PS2] to play with my wife now.

It is too late for me to be writing this… so I didn’t. I wrote a few hasty notes last night to ensure that I’d remember what the hell I wanted to talk about then went to bed.

Horatio is the best boyfriend in the world ever. Weasel and I have had long days with meetings and coughing and too much of everything so I thought “mmm Domino’s” like I do in all these situations. I also thought “nah we probably shouldn’t”. I started saying it almost, then said I didn’t think I should say. Sadly, I’m transparent and predictable so Weasel saw right through me. Once the idea was planted we couldn’t shake it. She asked if I’d call and I said okay. I picked up the phone and the fear attacked and I had to put it down. I decided a shower would help me feel better and possibly get me in a position to call with confidence.

It didn’t work. My desire for pizza was overwhelmed by my fear of the phone. I said as much to Weasel and that there was cannelloni to be had instead. She said she could probably call, I said it was up to her. Then I happened upon the idea of Horatio and he very sweetly called and got the specials for me and then placed the order. Wonderful wonderful boy.

Speaking of wonderful boys, Doodle, Weasel and I saw Harry Potter on Friday. If I pretended that I hadn’t read the book I could watch and enjoy it. The second I remembered the book it made me lean across to Doodle and say things like, “Woefully inaccurate!” and “That never happened!” Skip the next paragraph if you don’t want spoilers.

The pacing was bizarre; way too fast and it felt like a clip show. I wish that they’d taken two extra minutes to do the occulmency scene properly. Very disappointed that they had Neville tell Harry about his parents instead of doing it properly at the hospital over Christmas. Neville simply doesn’t tell, it was out of character. Also disappointed that Cho became the tattle-tale instead of Marietta, who was simply written out. Also didn’t like that Luna’s part got so minimised. Seamus’s apology seemed very out of the blue without the Quibbler article to convince everyone of Harry’s truthfulness. Why didn’t we see a single Quidditch Match?! Ron’s try out! Would have liked to have seen all the amazing rooms at the Ministry as well.

Gah.

On the way home from the cinema I was re-hashing the film in comparison to the book and some girls passing on the other side of the street heard and asked if I was American. I said yes so they crossed over and stood very close. I suspect the latter was alcohol induced. They apparently really love Americans. They wanted to know if Doodle and Weasel were and I said no, Weasel was my wife and Doodle was her brother. Then they wanted Weasel to know that she was soooo lucky to be married to an American. So there you go. Oh, they also loved lesbians.

We spent Saturday with Stoat & Mal – got to give them our old TV so no more worries about what to do with it. We got fed some very nice foods and the weather cooperated and let us eat in the garden. Monster in Law was not as bad as I thought it would be. I think the title gave too much away.

I keep getting my times mixed up – thinking I have a week less than I do. Ice Cream Tour is this Saturday and France is the Saturday after. Grommet follow-up this Friday, hair cut the next. Calls with Mom have been shifted to Wednesdays for the next two weeks to accommodate various holidays. Not sure how well I’ll do with calls to Blanketgirl on Tuesday then Mom on Wednesday. I’ll be all talked out.

The other nice thing about pizza for dinner: no dishes to wash up.

The media server has given us an unexpected gift: silence. The quiet that falls when we are able to turn off both computers is amazing. The server doesn’t cool itself with fans so it is virtually silent. I love quiet.

Busy week. Weasel sadly caught my cold so we’ve both been coughing and being generally miserable.

Our new TV arrived on Tuesday and my but it is fancy. I’m not even sure I could put into words the beauty and wonder of this device. I’ve never been in love with a TV before, so this is a very new and exciting time where I feel like I ought to check my hair before walking into the lounge.

Here is our new set-up:

The media server is on the middle shelf on the right. I’ve got all my files moved over. I have so much free disk space. I just have to get my torrents seeding properly again now that they’ve moved.

We’ve set-up a Last.fm account for the server, so if you like Weasel and/or me you should friend us. I figured out our middle birthday for it: August 21st, 1980.

A few weeks ago, I was delighted to discover that I could get Mountain Dew locally. Never mind that it apparently comes from the Middle East [or something, does anyone know the language?]:

Wednesday I skipped the gym in favour of cleaning. With my health being so questionable I knew I’d only have energy to do one or the other and it has been so long since I cleaned properly. I even alphabetised our CDs, DVDs and videos. I vacuumed everywhere and got rid of all kinds of crap. Happily the Salvation Army even had a collection on Thursday so I got to dump our old clothes too.

Work continues to be interesting. I’m not sure how much I can say, some things are not going like they should and I think that Eleanor & Ralph are going to have to make some uncomfortable decisions.

I also joined yet another bandwagon – FaceBook. It has some rather-good-fun things. I’m never sure why, but all of these services leave a bad taste in my mouth. Ah well. I’m saying that I’ve hooked up with all my friends though and I get a keyword to describe it so that’s pretty kick ass.

Weasel and I watched Yu-Gi-Oh the abridged series this week, very well done and highly enjoyable. More so because it was on TV! We didn’t have to watch it from our computers. Bliss bliss bliss.

Part of me is glad I was ill when I was booked off work anyway, the other part of me is grumpy because the whole point of this holiday was for Weasel and I to have some quality healthy time together.

Last Christmas we decided we’d give each other a media server. I have a lot of TV shows that I would prefer watching on that TV and I also have many many CDs that I’ve ripped over the years that needed storing. Since we were trying very hard to get out of debt at that time we decided to hold off buying it until we could pay for it free and clear. Weasel got her yearly bonus from work this month so we ordered it.

It arrived on Friday and my but it is shiny. It has all sort of great specifications I’m sure, but I don’t know what they are. Beyond serving media it also picks up digital TV signals, records TV, plays DVDs and burns CDs/DVDs too. Anyway, Weasel spent Friday afternoon hooking everything up and installing bits and pieces. After she was finished we discovered that our poor six year old television just isn’t up to coping with such overwhelming technology. Weasel spent yesterday researching and I put a thread up on UKA and we finally settled on the Samsung LE26R87BDX 26″ LCD. It should be here on Tuesday. Our old TV will probably go to Free Cycle or we’ll see if Doodle wants to upgrade his.

So yesterday I started moving all my files across. I expect it’ll take a few days to move everything. I’m so excited to have some free space again!

Also on Friday Stoat & Mal stopped by to gift us their old blender and liquidiser! The things I will blend and liquidise! We gave them our old water filter that we haven’t used since 2001 so win-win.

I’ve finally mapped out the route of the Third Annual Ice Cream Tour of London and updated the thread. I’m free! We actually have 16 people confirmed and I thought it was more like six.

I have actually managed to catch-up with a few things, I chased my umbrella feet and my Bulgarian CD [see below], I finally finished the transcontinental trade with Linz and I’m actually doing a few Perplexcity Cards!

At the beginning of June I won an auction for a fancy garden umbrella – £30 for something that is normally a minimum of £100. It arrived but the little base that it stands on was missing along with the bolts to attach it. So I e-mailed them and they said they’d send another straight away. It didn’t arrive so I e-mailed again and they are apparently sending me another set.

I ordered Stoyan Yankoulov and Elitsa Todorova’s CD back in May and haven’t had it yet. I bothered them at the beginning of June and I bothered them again now. I presume all of Europe fell in love with them after Eurovision.

My head hurts, I must stop looking at things now. Very tired of being ill.

It looks like I forgot to mention that Horatio had a ‘job’ interview the other week. Technically, there was no job. He is writing his master’s dissertation over the summer and will be finished with his degree officially at the end of September. So he’s been sending his CV to several companies just seeing what might be available. One company responded and asked him to come in, even though they didn’t have any openings – they just liked the look of him. The interview went really well and they said they’d contact him in a couple of weeks.

Yesterday he sent me a text saying he’d got the job. The non-existent job that they decided to create for him because they liked him so much. I don’t think I’ve ever been so proud of him in our entire relationship to date. This means he’ll be moving to Leeds area at the end of September/beginning of October. This means he got the first proper job he’s ever applied for. This means I’ll get to visit him instead of always having him come here. This means we won’t have his Mum as a thorn in our relationship. This means to see him I’ll only have to travel three hours instead of four! This is just fucking amazing.

As you know Weasel, Doodle and I went to see Tori Amos on Tuesday and Wednesday nights. First off, both shows were amazing for different reasons. The first night just rocked plain and simple. The energy was amazing and the set list was fantastic. She played Bells for Her which is one of my favourites, but it is even better with Matt on the drums. Yes, Anastasia and Bouncing Off Clouds were probably my other two highlights.

Afterwards we went and waited outside hoping to get an autograph or photograph or both. I thought we’d only waited 45 minutes or so, but Weasel told me later it was an hour and a half. She didn’t come out in the end so we just went back to the hotel.

We stayed in the hotel until 12, then headed back to the Apollo. We waited until around 2:30 when she arrived.

I was so scared everyone was going to push in front of me and I’d miss this. This was my last box I wanted ticked. I shook her hand in 1996 after I saw her in Boise, Idaho. I got her autograph in 1998 when I saw her in Salt Lake City. This time I got to talk with her:

Tori: You’re next sweetie
Me: Thank you *hands Boys for Pele CD booklet over*
Tori: I’ll sign inside somewhere *flips through pages*
Me: That’s fine
Tori: What’s your name?
Me: Amy
Tori: A-M-Y?
Me: Yeah
Tori: So how are you? *signing*
Me: Ecstatic! You’re amazing.

Tori: Thank you.
Me: Could I have a photo?
Tori: Of course *pose*
Me: This is a dream come true.
Tori: Thank you Amy

Keep in mind that I’m ill again*, I’d been sitting and standing outside in the wind and rain for the better part of three hours and I was nervous and so scared I’d miss this opportunity.

I was shaking afterwards and so close to tears and completely overwhelmed.

The second show got off to a rough start, for me, but it might have just been my illness. By the time Tori proper came out with Big Wheel all was well. In her solo bit, she played Winter then Cooling and I couldn’t breathe for 10 minutes. Caught a Lite Sneeze and Doughnut Song were highlights too. Seeing God twice, once by Santa [first show] and once by Tori [second] was really interesting. She really does become whichever girl she’s playing. Wonderful.

I have to say as well, there was a certain amount of relief seeing her perform this well. After The Beekeeper tour two years ago I thought she might have been burning out or something. She felt so distant and it scared me. It feels like she’s herself again and she’s seems to happy.

I’m glad I don’t have to wait outside venues anymore. This is it, everything I’ve ever wanted from her is here. I expect Doodle and Weasel are even happier that we don’t have to wait outside venues anymore. I felt so bad for making them stick around like that. I was too ill to go wandering around London anyway. Ah well, sometimes I think I have to be selfish.

This will sound so stupid, but I credit Tori indirectly with pretty much every single good thing in my life. She gave me hope when I was hopeless and trying to die in 1996. The possibility of seeing her was enough to make me want to keep going. Without her music there wouldn’t have been a Really Deep Thoughts mailing list and I never would have met Weasel. I wouldn’t have moved to the UK. I wouldn’t be who I am by any stretch. It gets very chaos theory at this point and I have to stop. When I was trying to tell Weasel some of this yesterday right after she said that Tori was my butterfly [of the chaos theory]. Everything good in my world can be whittled down to her and I’m so very very grateful.

I feel so stupid feeling so strongly about this, especially knowing that this is my mature, toned down version of my fandom. I’m shaking again and crying.

* The cold sort of got worse. I didn’t sleep very well at the hotel and I managed to drink a litre of water overnight. I made multiple trips to get more drugs throughout the day. I scream at gigs, I cannot do the neat whistles, so I do what I can. But my throat made that impossible. I managed a few during the first night, but by the second show my voice was on its way out. So bad I didn’t utter a peep the whole time – it was so hard. I had a million throat lozenges. By the time we got out of the show my voice was gone. I did chair dance since the Apollo is seating only and I clapped hard as I could for as long as I could.

This one day almost makes up for all the physical crap I’ve battled this year… and thank god I got my ear fixed before these shows.