I hate the news.

I hate reading about so many awful, preventable things that happen because some ass hat in some government or other couldn’t be bothered to think logically.

The latest one? The fact that there are 13 million children [and lord knows how many adults] without enough food in the US yet they insist on continuing the myth that obesity rates are rising and we’re all going to die.

Obesity rates haven’t changed in nearly 10 years. There is no proof that obesity causes any diseases or makes any disease worse – in fact most evidence is to the contrary with fat providing some sort of protection.

The rates for measuring obesity are outdated and not taking into account our healthier diets and ready access to most foods. Marks & Spencer re-did their sizing charts a few years ago, the reason was because they were still using sizing charts from the 1950s. This was immediately after the Second World War, people had their ration cards until 1954. Basically a whole society that was underfed and so of course they were slimmer, of course they were shorter.

Why spend so much time and money on fighting an invisible non-existent monster while millions of people suffer needlessly?

How do the people creating this fake ‘war on fat’ sleep at night? Don’t they feel sick? I feel sick just reading about it. I’m also so incredibly angry I brought on a coughing fit.

I’m angry because I read all of this and I want to do something to help. Do something to instigate change. But I have no idea what to do. I don’t even have the energy to do anything.

So I prefer to not follow the news. Impotent rage does not help me.

Now that that is out of my system, let’s move on… My ENT pre-assessment went well. Looks like all is okay for surgery next Tuesday. They didn’t want to look in my ears, they just wanted to ask all sorts of questions that I’ve answered in the past. I’m still all over the place emotionally. One minute I’m excited and I want to fast forward; the next I’m panicking and scared. I prefer having potential to no hope, and I won’t know which one I have until after the surgery.

The nice man who came round to paint the bathroom finished up today. It is stunning. It looks like new again. We’re also having a go at washing the blind, if it doesn’t work we’ll buy a new one. Because the shower curtains were down I had to have a bath this morning. I don’t like baths for washing in, they’re okay to soak in with a book. I think it was harder than showers too, I was very tired at the end. But that might just be because I woke up too early again today.

God is there anything more tedious for me to write about?

My socks! Many of them are developing holes that I’ll get to repair soon. Good times.

I hate my limbo life.

Edited to add
After Jummy’s comment I felt I should expand.

I left out some things I think. As long as you are behaving normally – i.e. eating a wide variety of foods and moving at least a little every day you will be whatever size it is that you are supposed to be.

Some of us are bigger, some of us are smaller and it is all okay.

I have a variety of studies I can provide links to and I will once I have them in a presentable order.

Some starting points Junkfood Science and a New York Times article.

More links!
Overweight and obese people with coronary artery disease have a lower mortality rate than normal weight people.
Obesity an advantage in dialysis patients
Essay on fat by Malcolm Kendrick, MD

There are so many more links. The more I read the more impotent rage I get so I’m going to stop there.

One other thing to keep in mind – most of these studies define overweight and obese using Body Mass Index [BMI]. BMI is complete nonsense! It doesn’t take into account frame size or build. This page will tell you that a woman should have 18-25% body fat, when I was tested I had 26%. At the time my BMI was 29 or 30. I was very athletic at the time [and only stopped because I was ill] and I have a large frame. I wear a size seven shoe for example, other women I know who are my height wear a size five. My hands are the same size as my wife’s and she’s seven inches taller than me.

The thing that drives me batty about all of this is governments trying to treat us as a series of numbers instead of people. I thank god that my WG doctors didn’t treat me like a number – on paper I didn’t have WG. It was only the experience and knowledge of my doctor that got me a diagnosis and treatment.

I think I ought to make it clear as well, I am not pro-obesity or pro-normal weight. I am pro-people. I want people to be happy and healthy. I want them to have access to enough food and I want them to have the chance to work their bodies. I want them to have a normal relationship with food. Why are there so many people who won’t eat a god-damn cupcake on someone’s birthday. Eating one cupcake won’t hurt you. I want people to live. Having that taken away from me has only highlighted how precious it is.