I wrote this yesterday:
Seven hours of fun and entertainment and I’m broken. This hurts my job prospects.

Weasel and I were invited to tea yesterday. I thought we’d go, have some tea and cake and head home. Instead we got chatting and eating wonderful nibbles and playing with the softest kitty on earth. For seven hours.

I woke up today and could barely move. I woke up early because I hurt. I had some painkillers and a shower. I’m fairly certain I had a fever too. I had to cancel swimming.

Weasel went to her first hair consultation today. She finally stopped resisting me! Muhahaha. She’s working a new part, newly straightened hair and has plans for growing it long again. She has an appointment for June too.

I have a new cable for my computer. It now puts sound out through my hearing loop. I can listen to stuff on my computer and hear what’s happening in the room. It is wonderful.

My parents have booked their flights to come see me! 5th May to 26th. Very very excited. Also, we’re all going to Cornwall while they’re here!

Writing this today:
On the advice of my therapist, I’m re-examining the idea of proofreading from home. It seems there is little demand for only proofreaders. One must have secondary skills. An initial course costs about £400. I get very overwhelmed and confused by the financial aid side of things and have to stop.

I rearranged our bedroom a few weeks ago. We switched sides too. I think I’ve been on the left side of the bed for ten years so moving to the right was very strange. It has it’s advantages though, I seem to sleep better when I can’t see the clock. I can open the curtains again.

Jim [next door's cat] has been visiting regularly. He is becoming more confident, he jumps up on things like window sills, pianos and beds.

My sister could use some good vibes if anyone has any to spare.

Weasel came into the lounge wearing a borrowed fancy velvet belly-dancing shirt and skinny jeans.

‘What do you think?’ she askes of the shirt.

‘Can I see it with your skirt?’

She turned for her bags and pulled out her gorgeous 18-yard skirt. She’s peeling her jeans off and lifting the skirt over her hips. She tops it off with a black waist scarf covered in jingly coins.

I assess her now and declare her gorgeous.

‘Could you tie this on for me please?’ she hands me her new headdress.

She wants a bit of her hair framing her face, not all pulled back. So I split the hair over her ears, pull the back part over the headdress and tie it on. The sides look a little puffy. I try pinning it with hair grips unsuccessfully.

‘Can I use my air styler?’

‘Okay.’

We head upstairs to the dressing room. I curl her hair to frame her face properly, curl her fringe slightly to keep it out of her eyes. There’s a few hairs of her fringe that need trimming so I quickly do it. The hairs stick to her cheek.

‘I always manage to cut your hair right after you put on lotion.’ I brush gently at the hairs.

‘It isn’t lotion; it’s foundation.’

Weasel and I own make-up. We’re even fairly competent at putting it on, mostly though, we don’t bother. For me, it is too much work for too little reward. Also, think it is like putting perfume on a skunk.

As I doing her hair I have to ask her to kneel sometimes because she’s so tall and my left shoulder is mad at me. I get her to turn around so I can do the back. I curl the bottom layer under and flick the top layers outward. The contrast is gorgeous.

She approves the look and I get my hair spray and apply liberally.

As she admires the result in the mirror she asks about more make-up. I say that I love the green eye shadow she’s used in the past, it will highlight the reds of her dancing outfit.

We play with different application methods; experiment with liquid eye-liner. I show her my eye-liner-pencil-on-lips-topped-with-Chapstick technique to get a little colour on one’s lips without having to use lipstick.

Hair done, make-up in place, buffet food contribution sorted and wardrobe ready to go, she calls a taxi.

I go for a long walk in the dark, in the rain and it’s amazing.

it’s in the stars
in the sun
it’s everywhere
in everyone
and it will be
every day
from now on
from now on we are one
and it’s amazing

Life has a sneaky way of happening whether you’re ready for it or not. It moves forward without me, I’m still looking at two weeks ago and here we are. I hate re-capping constantly, but how can you live and life and document it at the same time? I’ll try to be brief.

Gigs!
Imogen Heap on 12 February. I took my wheelchair and managed to get to the front. The hearing loop was broken. The show was very well put together. The opening acts reminded me of Ross on Friends playing his ‘sound’. She had a gorgeous shirt on that I coveted for Weasel. Cute boots too. Got a lovely blue tee-shirt with her tree logo on.

Depeche Mode on 20 February. Ecstasy! Horatio drove down on Friday night. Joined Weasel, Doodle and I. We watched South Park and ate Dominos. Saturday we drove down to the O2 Arena. Parked. Bathroom run and merchandise purchase. The 2009 tee-shirts were marked down to £10, so I got two shirts. Walked [I was pushed in my wheelchair] into Greenwich. Tried to see the meridian line, but the hill was too steep for me to get up. Very late lunch. Back to the O2. Found our seats. Enjoyed Nitzer Ebb rather a lot. Best opening act I’ve seen in ages. Seats were amazingly good. Exceptional set list. Highlights: Walking in My Shoes, In Your Room, Never Let Me Down, Stripped and Behind the Wheel. Made it home around 1:15. Sunday we had breakfast, played Monopoly, then Horatio drove Doodle home and continued home himself.

Doctors!
I’ve seen the chest doctor – he is happy. My lungs are much the same as before the dilatation. I’m definitely coughing less [yay!]. He thought I’d lost weight even though I’d gained 5kg since I’d seen him last [supposedly].

I saw my ENT, my ear infection is finally cleared up after nearly three months. I can wear my hearing aid again which is very nice.

Sign language! Singing! Arts & Crafts!
I’m still loving the BSL classes. I want to practice more. We have our 102 assessment in a couple of weeks. We’ve just finished sports and hobbies.

Singing lesson was cancelled last week, so I’ll have it on the 10th. I’m really pleased with my progress. I’ve been practising much more and I think I’m doing a reasonable job.

I’ve been playing the piano too. I’m just looking at some of Tori’s songs – ‘Here. In My Head’ and ‘Sister Janet’ today. I’ve very slow, but I find that I’m getting better at reading the music.

I’ve drawn twice this week too. Not for long, but I’ve done it. I also read a sewing pattern and asked my loved ones with experience for advice. I’m hoping to have the pattern cut out soon then the fabric.

My parents!
Still haven’t decided if/when they’re coming to visit. It was supposed to be May, but who knows. While in therapy I told her about how I was blessed to be a ‘peace marker’ when I was born and that I’ve been told that my entire life. When you’re five and trying to keep the peace that means you back down and don’t fight for anything. I think that explains why I have trouble asking for things [I probably won't get it] and why I have very little passion [no point in wanting anything, I wouldn't get it]. So after talk with her, I talked to my Dad. I explained half of this and told him that I think I’m treated differently to my sisters. To my surprise, he agreed with me! We had a chat and I’m hoping good things will happen. Additionally, he talked to my Mom during the following week and when I spoke with her she surprised me too. They sent some money to me to keep in a savings account so they could use it when they visit. My Mom told me I could use that money to hire help with the cleaning. All I had to do was let them know I’d done it. I was shocked. I also thought maybe it was a trick. I talked to my therapist about it and she rightly pointed out that the only way to know what’s going to happen it to do it. So I’m going to research carpet cleaners and pay them with my parents money. Still reeling. My therapist and I agreed I’d do it within a month.

My sister!
Is awesome.

Random!
I roasted a turkey. I’ve been craving turkey sandwiches. I’ve not done it before, but thanks to my sisters guidance and a bit of research I did it!

I’ve bought tickets for my family to see Alice in Wonderland next Tuesday. Very excited.

Yesterday Stoat and I went to the health food co-op shop and I stocked up on my bread ingredients and other staples to the tune of £70. Afterwards we went to a local park and watched swans, geese, moor hens and coots. The coots diving for food were particularly awesome, check out this video.

Doodle, Weasel and I are seeing Tom McRae on Thursday. Fun.

Going swimming tomorrow. Love swimming. Will remember to take my card this time.